Procul et Ultra
by Cheezcake-chan
Summary: High-school in a AU (Canada), Naruto lives alone and is forced to work with the most popular kid at school for the last project for history class. This is my first fic ever and I've been influenced by many others. I don't write that well and hope that people will bear with my bad writing, English was my third language.
1. Painful Satisfaction

The bell rang, period 4 is over and so is the day at school. The class hurried to the door and made their way out, flooding the hallways to reach their lockers. I was at the back of the room, placing my books in my backpack and making sure that nothing at my desk was left behind. My Uchiha key-chain was rustling as I closed the bag only to be approached by a boy with a grey sweater, which was too big but didn't look bad on him, and skinny jeans.

"So umm, partners eh." The blonde pat the back of his head with his left hand, he was trying to smile but was having trouble.

"Naruto right?" I raised myself from my bag and looked back down at the short blonde.

"uuh-eh yeah" He was nodding and looked at the floor, only showing his blue eyes when I looked away, they had this beautiful glow and even though he looked bitter, he eyes caught all my attention. He was holding his backpack by the straps and blushing lightly, I could tell he was not comfortable around me which was odd but I liked it, he was good looking and abnormally cute. "I'm Sasuke" I swung my bag on my right shoulder "Give me your phone number so we can plan when to do it and where."

"yeah s-sure." He got a blue pen out of his pocket "Do you have paper?"

"Write it on my hand." I stretched out my hand left hand to him. His soft, little fingers grabbed it gently, writing quickly digits on my palm. I could smell his hair, his head was right under mine. Writing down his cell number, he backed up and said "When are you free?"

"I'm not sure but I'll call tonight to answer."

"Okay, I have no plans for the next few weeks."

He stormed out the room and disappeared from my sigh shortly after turning the hallway corner. I guess working on this final project will be harder than I thought. I walk out the history classroom, take the exit nearest to the bus zone and meet up with friends by the waiting area.

"I'm stuck with Shikamaru." A blonde whined to her friends also waiting.

"You shouldn't be whining, I'm with that looser Lee." The pink-haired girl said.

"I'm with that blonde kid that always sits in the back." I said as I made my entrance to the circle of friends. They either stuck their noses to a cellular device with no attention given to anyone else or had a discussion about the last project for school, sharing who they got stuck with.

"Why are you whining Ino, Shika's a smarty no?" The brunet barked while lifting himself from his phone.

"He's just, ugh, a smart ass and kind of creepy Kiba." She shivered to the thought.

"Well at least he works, that blond kid Naruto never does anything in class." Sakura said looking at me, the moment she said 'Naruto' I had a flashback of the ocean blue eyes that mesmerized me.

"As long as he doesn't make the project harder than it should, I'm fine." The buses started up their motors and students started to walk over, climbing the front steps and sitting at their spots. We all said our goodbyes and made our way to the yellow buses. I got to my bus, walked over to the back and sat down next to my brother who was in sec 5 (grade 11), looking out the window. After leaving the bus zone, the bus took its usual road to Candiac, where I lived and soon I would be relaxing at home and possibly planning for the last project. Thinking about how to go on about the project but definitely thinking about Naruto, a boy I should have met a long time ago.

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><p>Walking slowly past the familiar gazes of hatred and disgust, I made my way to the locker I would meet every period, holding my backpack straps and looking down to avoid the eyes that met mine daily, everywhere. With a quick jolt, I opened my lock and swung the door open, only to witness a locker of badly placed and organized books along with clothes and other useless things. The inner side of the door had a mirror and I could see myself, a short blonde and blue-eyed boy with a face that barely knew what smiling felt like, only bitter expressions and tears.<p>

Having past the entire day yet again lectured by the teachers for my late homework, and my habit to be late myself, the day passed by painfully slow, like most. Finally the weekend was here again, ending another torture of a week at school. Not being with anyone, whether at lunch, in class or at home, just made the solitude increase. No one talked to me, no one sat with me or helped me. I gathered my stuff and walked out the exit to begin my journey back home. The walk home was not long, I just had to walk for about ten minutes to get to my apartment, stopping only to get a drink at the corner store on my way. Opening the door to the apartment and walking a few more steps up, I stared into the silent room, slight noise from car exhaust and brakes echoed from the open window in the living room, allowing air to circulate.

I took off my shoes and left them oddly placed where they usually lie, near the stair railing. Leaving a sigh before collapsing on the sofa like a log, I relaxed and thought about my day with my head sunk deep in the couch cushions, my right hand freely hanging and the other laying parallel to the body.

"I hate school." I told himself with the cushions filtering the loud voice into a more silent outburst. No one was there to listen and I knew it, no one was there to tell me that I mattered to them or that everything will be fine. I lied there for a while, letting my mind calm to the ambience of silence. Then it came to me, the face of today. The face that made me feel different, I couldn't even speak normally when that face was directed to me. His eyes piercing mine, making it impossible to stare for too long. He was pre- WAIT! What am I thinking of. I'm not gay, haha that would be like the worst. Imagine being hated by everyone and then adding more hate by telling them that your were gay. Almost like asking to be bullied more, but he was pretty. His pale skin, strong neck, sharp eyes and hair. Even his voice made the hairs on the back of my neck stiff up. Sending a chilling wave down my spine. IS that what it feels like. that connection that makes people talk to each-other and eventually hook up. Is that the feeling of love?

All of this is making my body feel strange, heavy and simply odd. I took sloppy steps to the bathroom and placed my hands on the sink's sides, supporting myself to stand. I would stare at myself sometimes and wonder; will I ever matter to someone, will someone ever look at me and love me, will I die and no one care? That stuck to me, die and no one care. I would repeat it in my mind and stare into the blue eyes in the mirror, I need a drink. It's probably this weather that is making me feel weird, the late spring winds, the stormy and grey days in the Canadian skies. The time that nature wakes up from the long winter only to be welcomed with thunder and aggressive winds.

After drinking some water I went to my room and lied down on my back, placing my left hand on the back of my head and feet crossed. Half naked, only wearing my sweater, I was playing around with a pair of scissors. Carving little shapes and designs on my leg, it felt good. It felt... good. The sharp edge lightly scratching my skin, I wonder if. I stared to pierce my skin deeper, slowly. A thin stream of red started to flow, gently off my thigh, this felt _good_. I then realized something, I was smiling, and for real this time. A sincere smile, a honest smile! I got up and ran to the bathroom and put my right foot on the toilet bowl, what if I...

Cut deeper, aww yes, the pain felt so good. I could not resist but to let my head fall back out of the pleasure, oh god yes the pleasure. Why have I not done this before, I should do this more often, it makes me feel like all the 'bad blood' is being poured out of me. making me feel lighter and oh so much better. All the memories of the people staring at me are flowing out, leaving me without the constant reminder of the hate guided towards me. The scissors were running slowly parallel to the last cut, making a new one.

"mmmm." this is bliss.

My phone vibrated on the bathroom sink, what the, who is texting me?

"Wanna hang out tomorrow? We could discuss the project and maybe hang out afterwards, even sleep over if you want?" Was I dreaming, was that what really just happened. Maybe when I cut myself the world rewards me, maybe if I cut myself more I will finally make friends. I covered my pleasure marks with bandages and went back to bed, there I replied to the most popular kid at school with "sounds good."

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><p><strong>When I wrote half-naked, I meant in underwear, just to make it clear. I'm working at a factory and for the sake of paying school I must devote time to back breaking labour, but I will write as much as I could. I apologize if my writing is terrible but I do hope some people would enjoy my first fic ever. <strong>

**Sisu-Chan**


	2. Awakening Smile

**Hey, me again, this chapter is more of an transitional chapter so please bare with me.**

**oh yeah and I own nothing, this is all property to the owners of naruto.**

**I think that's how they do it, regardless, enjoy.**

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><p>I woke up hugging my blanket, locking it with my knees comfortably. I'm so comfy, so... loosen up. I don't feel tense or rigid, instead I'm soft and flexible. Birds chirping as every morning but this time enjoyable, the sun rays scattered on the floor, illuminating slightly. I hated mornings before, I hated the feeling and could not bear to stay laying down, instead I would get up and watch television or go on my computer or even go to the skate park. Now I just want to keep feeling like this, I can stretch and turn, gently brushing the pillows that for some reason felt so good. BZZTT, my phone vibrated, leaving me to slowly raise my head and reach for it. It was Sasuke giving me his address, asking if I wanted to be picked up or take the bus.<p>

"I can take the bus, I don't want you to waste gas." I wrote and sent. After a few more minutes of resting the phone vibrated again.

"Give me your address, my bro and I are going to pick you up, when do you want to meet?" I looked at the time, 1 pm! I slept for more than 12 hours, how, I don't know. I usually have sleeping problems but tonight was like if I slept in heaven. I don't even want to get up but I need to, for the sake of the project and talking to Sasuke. I put my feet on the floor and stood up, stretching with my arms wide open and groaning.

"I was going to hang out at the skate park for a while before, wanna pick me up from there at 3?"

"Will do."

With that solved I walked to the kitchen with a smile and made myself a breakfast of cereal and orange juice. After eating I got some shorts and socks, shoes and skate board, backpack with all of the essentials to survive a sleepover, and finally ran outside towards the skate park. Running as fast as I could and jumping on the board to go fast, I was feeling ALIVE! The sun was bright and the sky clean from clouds, the dead trees woke up from winter and blushed a clear green. I could not help but to swing my arms wide open and ride with a huge smile on my face. I feel happy. I missed this feeling.

Once there, I went on with practising my skating. It was short-lived though, after an hour and a half, the black-haired pair parked in the parking lot and walked up to me, with their v-neck shirts and tight jeans, showing the toned muscles they had making me kind of thirsty. "Hey, come sit next to me for a bit, I wanna relax before leaving." I was practically begging at the two boys standing in front of me, looking down at the sitting blonde.

"You weren't wrong Sasuke, he is cute." taller Sasuke told to normal Sasuke.

What! He thinks I'm cute, he doesn't hate me. The cutting really worked, it made me feel good and others didn't hate me! I can feel my cheeks blushing so I turned to the floor and pretended that I never heard him. I placed my chin on my knees that were held together by my arms and pondered on the idea that hurting myself actually made me happier. It must be true, it felt good and in the end people started to talk to me and notice me. Maybe if I cut deeper, I would get more happiness... maybe it would make my life worth something finally. Sasuke brushed off his brother's comment cooly but I was busy fantasizing for the next time that I will bring a blade to my thigh, the pleasure will surely make any day better and knowing now how to get rid of the heavy weight on my should some call guilt must be one of the best things that ever happened to me. I closed the pandora box of my life and opened scars and let them slip out of my system. Cutting was now the music to be happy, it would play the melody of happiness as blades were the instruments.

"What's that?" Sasuke pointed to my right leg.

That was my scars, oh shit! Think of something "I fell from my board yesterday, some sign cut me a bit, no big deal." Genius, that makes total sense. They'll suspect nothing!

"Huh, okay, let's go to my place, I'm dying of heat." Taller Sasuke told the other.

"Oh, by the way, I'm Itachi. Sasuke's older brother if you didn't know."

"I'm Naruto, I'm in sec 4."

After the introductions and brief relaxation session we had on the grass by the skate park we walked over to the green Honda, rusty at some points and made probably before I ever went to school. Fifteen minutes later, the Honda pulled into a driveway, not just any driveway. The driveway to a mansion with grey stones and a huge garden by the entrance. This was what upper-class living looked like.

"If you want, we could also go for a dip in my in-door pool later."

"YOU HAVE A POOL!" Oops, I guess my excitement became apparent when my response was louder than the motor.

"Yeah, and it's in-doors."

I wonder if rich people ever got bored, like imagine just having always something to do, and when you got bored you could just buy something new to spend time on. The car stopped and shut down once one of the garage doors was a few meters away, unlocking the car, we all got out and walked to the front entrance. The two massive wooden doors with gold handles swung open. To a marble floor room, decorated with a circular staircase and a huge golden chandelier, along with some Victorian looking furniture and paintings.

"Five bathrooms, five bedrooms, three living rooms, two dinning rooms, a two level garage, pool room, library, wine room and finally a entrance. Don't get lost now." Itachi said while walking up the stairs with a wild smirk.

"Let's go to my room, you won't need to worry about getting lost." I followed the raven to his room upstairs, the walls had solid wallpaper, with a golden line passing by the middle, the railings had metal curved flowers pop out from the metal supports. The rooms weir huge, a piano on my left by some fireplace. He closed the door to his room and told me to sit on his couch, after both of us settled he broke the silence with "The project will be easy to make, I just need you to be able to speak fluently in-front of the class. I already made most of it because I had nothing better to do."

"Really, you already worked on it."

"Yeah, only a bit of work left."

"Oh, then why call me over?"

"Because you also have nothing better to do am I right?"

He was, his shirt was slightly lifted, showing only, showing the bottom of his stomach and abs. Mmmm, he was resting on his bed, laying with one leg folded to a stand and the other stretched out.

"Let's swim a bit okay."

Oh fuck.

Oh fuck.

No!

"Okay." I can't believe it, I'll see him without a shirt. Hope no one will think that I squashed a tomato on my face because I know that I will be shining red when we will be swimming.

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><p><strong>tell me hat you think, too slow, too sudden and out of place?<strong>

**Sisu-Chan**


	3. My turn!

**First of all, When the girls take off their jean shorts, they have bikinis under. Just to clarify, I don't want people to start thinking I write about kids skinny dipping (or do I?). I'm getting tired of work and sometimes just don't have the energy to write, this is why this chapter will be a little bit longer to publish (my apologies).**

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><p>"Come out of the bathroom already!" I pounded on the door, demanding the blonde to finally get out from the eternity he spent in the room.<p>

"y-yeah o-one second!"

The door opened to short boy wearing my old bathing suit, skin-tight light blue short-shorts. My parents brought these back from their vacation in Sweden when I was younger, that's why it says "Svenska". I forced him to wear them because he had no other clothes and I would not want him to be naked after this, or maybe.

Well.

He was looking right into my eyes, which were looking down at his. He's blushing, trying to smile but is failing. His left leg was slightly raised, he's shy it's obvious.

"Sorry, it's just that you were in there for like fifteen minutes."

"No it's ok-"

"You have more than one cut."

"Huh?" He rubbed the back of his head again.

"On your leg." He looked down and gently pat the scar.

"Oh yeah, it always seems to run into trouble." He giggled lightly. Is he one of those people that makes puns all the time? Maybe.

"Mhm, anyway, Kiba and others are coming over."

"Yeah, this was actually a get-together I planned and wanted you to be introduced to the rest of the gang."

"Uh."

Ding-Dong (and more fancy notes but who has time to describe that)

I pushed the doors to the living room and made my way to the entrance, opened the door and let in all the people that hitched a ride with Kiba's mom. She was usually the one driving all of the gang here for some reason, charmingly enough, she waved goodbye as she drove off. Kiba was there, Ino, Sakura and Gaara, the people I saw everyday, or almost.

"Already changed are you."

"Yeah, got ready with Naruto."

"Who's that?"

"Just get in already Kiba."

The four teens ran in, cheering and jumping as usual, the girls just had to take off their jean shorts to be fully capable to swim, which they did as soon as they made it to the pool. The boys had it simpler, just take off a shirt and you're good to go. They started to play around the shallow end, splashing and forming teams. The laughter was heard across from the almost empty huge rooms of the manor. The only problem was that someone was not having fun, instead, they stood by the pool. Still holding their right arm with their left hand. I walked up to the blonde teen and looked at the pool.

"You want to stand here all day or do you want to jump in?"

"Umm"

"Look, they're nice people, here follow me."

I grabbed him, not too hard don't worry, he yelped lightly and followed me to the pool, he resisted a few times and right before I threw him in the pool he yelled "I can't sw- SPLASH". We stayed in the pool for almost an hour playing all sorts of dumb games, then we got bored and went to the basement living-room, heavily armed with bags of chips and 'liquor'. All gathered by the sofas and preparing a table for a card game. We talked about anything; school gossip, past events and experiences and laughed. Except that Naruto didn't share anything, actually he was barely heard and very quiet.

"So you got any siblings?" Kiba asked to the quiet blonde.

He sprung up and then slowly looked back down "Umm, well I- I'm kind of a Orphan."

Everyone stopped.

"Like ever since you are born or like sometime after."

"Since I could remember, I was a refugee." The blonde just made all of us feel like shit.

"Well at-least there are no fights for who gets the bathroom." Kiba laughed and the rest of the gang giggled a bit, but quieted down soon after. The boy only responded with a whisper of "Yeah."

He was back at looking down at the floor and shuffling with his drink. I wonder where he comes from, if he's a refugee. Anyway, we decided to drink our alcohol, I mean drinks, and abandoned the card game. Instead we can use one of the bottles to play "spin the bottle". This is going to be fun. Everyone had gathered around and the girls kept on giggling from the fact that the male to female ratio was slightly pointing-out towards sausage-fest. Having all agreed to kiss no matter what, I started, put my hand on the bottle and spun it. Slowly slowly going towards the little blonde boy I can't wait! Annnnnd it stops on Kiba.

Well Fuck.

"Come 'ere pretty." The brunette idiot called Kiba flew his arms wide open and made the dumbest face with his lips sticking out.

"Hell no, Gaara mayb-" He grabbed me and kissed me.

"I'm going to murder you."

"Only 'cause you love me eh." The rest of the gang laughed hysterically the entire time. Even Naruto was giggling while hiding his smile with his hand. I was _so _close, hopefully next time. Then sakura spun the bottle, it was spinning and every guy was waiting for it to land on him, and then it stopped on Naruto. What the actual fuck! That was suppose to be me! She reaches over to him and got very close and said "lucky boy" and then her tongue invaded his mouth. Damn I wish I was in Sakura's place, once they finished the gang cheered and clapped to the blushing boy. Then he said something that made everyone laugh real hard "I've been kissed by better." Gaara spun the bottle and... Naruto again.

Done.

I'm done.

Does the world hate me, is it trying to tease me? Kiba was trying hard not to die of laughter and Gaara was slightly disappointed. Well there they go, kissing again. But the weirdest thing happened, not during the kiss but right after. Naruto untangled his arms from around Gaara's neck and when they separated their lips time went into slow-mo. He was turning towards me and looked at me right in the eyes, this look was so, so, I don't know how to describe it as. Erotic? Lustful? I don't know but he looked at me and my heart skipped a beat. I need to kiss him!

"Well I guess it's my turn to kiss, again." Naruto chuckled and made the bottle spin, turning and turning. Time seemed to have gone into slow-mo again. He was looking at me the entire time with those deep blue eyes. heavily breathing, forcing his chest to move up and down with each breath, even through his grey sweater. Then it happened. He did something no one thought he'd do, or stop. He slammed his hand on the bottle to stop it and kissed me, holding my head with both his hands. Everyone's jaw dropped, not a single word or whisper.

He backs away and looks into my eyes and says "I don't care about the bottle, I want to kiss you."

Well.

I got what I wanted, and he also got what he wanted. So I don't care if he broke the rules, but the others. Still staring, not even Kiba is saying something stupid.

"Well I guess I'll let it slip."

"Umm, is there something we should know about you two." Ino said pointing to Naruto.

"No." We both said at the same time.

"_Yeah._" they all said doubting our answer.

"So" I said, "Ino's turn."

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><p><strong>I'm surprised anyone is actually liking this, like seriously, I get jealous of elementary kids when they write in English. Anyways, feel free to ask questions or say anything for that matter. Next chapter will take time too, I'm having lots of work and I'm going to the Czech Republic in 5 days so I need to put my attention on other things like packing. <strong>


	4. The Itch

**Wi-fi is impossible to reach here ;~; (I'm staying over to my family's in the eastern parts of the Czech Republic) I'm sorry for like the time it took to post this but it's hard to write in this heat! Gome Gome, I will do my best to keep updating. **

**This belongs to the creator(s) of Naruto, not me; I'm too white to make manga (jk jk, no racism)**

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><p>"What was that all about." He broke the silence with a quick question.<p>

"wha" I kept my eyes shut, and my head still facing in the opposite direction of the rich kid.

"The whole, bottle thing."

Shit. Now he's going to split my head open and uncover that I like other guys. Maybe if I try and convince him that I was a bit too "gone" because of the alcohol he might drop it.

"I was tired and kinda drunk."

He's so going to buy that.

"Are you still drunk and tired?" I can feel he's waiting to ask more questions.

That's a trick question, he's going to dig deeper, I need to improvise.

"We should sleep, we had too many drinks."He kept quiet, maybe he's too tired, or he just is unmotivated to continue. Either way, I herd him lay back down and rest, leaving a sigh. We stayed quiet for a few minutes and somehow we both knew the other was awake. We were both laying in the basement with Kiba and Gaara stealing the sofas as we vacated the floor between the television and leg-rest. With both our backs turned to each-other. I was resting with my knees to my stomach and hands freely resting in-front of me.

"The cuts." What the hell is he on about all the time.

"wha-" I yawned "cuts?"

"Those aren't accidents are they."

"You mean the scratches on my leg?"

Kiba snored loudly and made both of us shut up for a bit.

"Why."

"I'm tired" I pretended to be sleepy, trying to avoid what might turn into a disaster.

We both fell asleep soon after, only to be woken up by his parents calling the teens up for breakfast. They must have known of our presence after seeing the two girls sleeping in Sasuke's room or any other evidence of our visit like the bottles of alcohol in the kitchen. I got up, slowly lifting my fat ass and walked to the stairs, only me and Kiba were left downstairs which means that the others must have woken up earlier. I was too lazy to fix my sweater, I looked like I stabbed a fork in the toaster with my hair all over the place and my "zombie" walk.

"Hello there." A sweet voice swung in my direction.

"Uh- oh good morning" I yawned and scratched my eyelid with my right hand clenched up in a fist. "Mommy Uchiha." Oops, that sounded so innocent and I meant to say 'Miss Uchiha' but her voice was so comforting that I accidentally said mommy. I took a step back when I realized my mistake with my face looking like a deer staring at headlights. She smiled at me and bowed forward, "What's your name little kitten." Did she just call me a little kitten?

"I'm not little!" I kick my right foot on the floor, seeking recognition.

"Hello 'I'm not little', how are you?" I pouted, seriously, she's using that joke on me.

"Are you hungry little kitten?" It's like if I was talking to a wall. Right when she said 'hungry' my stomach growled for something to consume.

"Umm."

"Come with me." She grabbed my hand and guided me all the way to the kitchen, decorated with expensive and shiny stuff all over. Ino and Sakura were sitting both eating pancakes with Gaara and Sasuke. I looked like a damn lost toddler, with my big grey sweater and black underwear with cats on it, my left hand holding that of a parent.

"Sleep well princess?" Sasuke said with a wide smile.

"Please don't call me that." I hated that name so much, but it was too silly not to smile too.

"I'll take that as a yes little kitten." I just remembered that I was being guided like a kid and looked back at her with a :Do-you-wanna-die face. I swear if they join forces and call me a little-kitten-princess, I will take all that maple syrup on the table and force them to eat their pancakes with marmalade. And for Canadians, maple syrup is a necessity to life, especially pancakes. The morning passed by quite nicely, with a few jokes directed towards me every now and then. I liked this, I liked being with people. Yesterday was fun and today was relaxing, talking to people made me feel different and I needed more of it. After we finished all that needed to be done at Sasuke's, we thanked Mikoto and we all got in a car with Kiba's mom who decided to take us back home. When she dropped me off to my apartment, I thanked her and ran to my apartment.

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><p>"The project is almost done, just a few more additions and it will be a easy A. Don't need to thank me, I can do this kind of stuff while picking my nose." Sasuke sent me a text a few hours later I got home, I replied with "You know I can work too."<p>

We spent the entire evening texting back and forth, leaving nothing behind until he asked me the familiar question.

"What's with the cuts on your thigh?"

"I told you already, I fell from my skateboard."

After I answered him he hasn't replied, actually, we haven't texted back until the end of the weekend. Planning where we could hang out at school and meet up somewhere. He seemed happy to meet me, even though I've been in a few of his classes for years. I guess sitting in the back and staying quiet was not helpful, then again it did decrease the chances of being bullied, almost.

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><p>Once Monday came, I spent the entire trip to school thinking of what to say so that people will know that I don't have any "special" feelings towards another boy, even though I knew that was very wrong. Half-way I even debated if I should actually fall off of my board to make the wounds more "accidental", that would make it more authentic and people will probably know that it was not self-inflicted. So I did, I rammed my board in a wooden electric post and got a few bruises, mission accomplished.<p>

Diiiiinng Diiiinng!

the school bell was screaming through some loudspeakers, demanding all students to be in their homerooms, I ran to mine and met Ino, who I had no idea was in my homeroom for four years. We talked about our classes and stuff, she seemed nice and I never really had a conversation with someone before I went to Sasuke's, all along I was reflecting of my right thigh, the one with 2 scars and a few bruises. Whatever it is, it's working, punishing myself is making people around me like me and it stopped the feeling of hatred that I would get when walking in the hallways. I could smile and have conversations without the fear of getting spat in the face. Cutting made me likeable, cutting was going to make my life better and boy I could not wait 'till I got a hold of a blade again.

The day was, remarkably smooth, I haven't been beaten up or cursed at while making friendly conversations with all the kids at the loud table (the table that had all of the people that had the most fun and laughter) especially Sasuke. I was actually trying to act like I totally didn't give a shit about him but every-time he spoke or did anything that involved me I accidentally blushed. I knew it because of the burning sensation in my cheeks and the smile he would make when I looked at him.

Him.

Him.

Thats all that mattered when he was around, all that was in my head. The school-day ended and my thigh got seriously itchy. I don't want the day to end because it was going so well but man I'm craving exacto blades. I took the same route that I took every other day and rested at home, homework untouched, like always. Opened the bathroom door, picked up my exacto blade that I nicknamed "stairwell to happiness" and put it straight to work, punishing myself while thanking the world for pain. Pain that drained the "bad" me out and left me pure of "bad" blood.

Bzzzzzt my phone vibrated.

"Hey." It was a text from Sasuke.

"Hi :3"

"hey umm, are you ok?"

"Of course xD"

"You seemed different today."

"Dude, you know me for like 4 days."

He didn't answer, shit what did I say. I meant that in a joky fun way, hope he was not insulted.

"I know your secret."

What.

How the fuck does... Impossible I didn't tell anyone. He's bluffing, trying to make me confess, he's going to have to try harder.

"What secret?"

I put away my blade and bandaged myself, I needed to lay down and let my body relax from all the blood that I drained.

"You can tell me man, don't worry."

"Ok I confess, I like being called a kitten."

"Not that Naruto."

our conversation ended there, I didn't want to lie more to him, he's the one who is making me popular after-all.

"I care Naruto, goodnight." That text surprised me more than it should of, it made me cry a bit because that's the first time that those words have been told to me. Especially from him it made my cold body turn warm. I guess I'll sleep extra well tonight, I cut myself and was told that someone cared about me. I guess life is not that bad after all.

"goodnight saske"

* * *

><p><strong>Was it worth the wait? I hope so, I would not want to upset my beloved fans. not that many Canadians compared to Americans so I wanted to ask, do you guys down there have three different schools for the whole junior high and all? Like here in Canada it's 6 yeas elementary, 5 years secondary (high school) and then collegeuniversity.**


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